Thank You God

He is jealous for me, loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His love and mercy

I just had to blog this. It’s personal.. But I really want to share it. You see, I received my end-year report from school and was really beaten down by it. I had to admit the comments were true, but harsh, and it really made me wonder if I was really cut out to do acting. I considered why I loved this, I asked myself so many times if this is really God’s plan. Did I take a wrong step somewhere? Why would He place me in this place?

When all of a sudden I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
and I realize just how beautiful You are
and how deep Your affections are for me

It was during worship. Rachel led this song. I asked God why – Why didn’t He give me more talent? I can’t freaking sing that well, I don’t have musical talent, I’m just mediocre. I can’t do anything damn well. And right there and then, I saw an image of myself asleep, and someone cradling my face and stroking my hair. “Stephanie,” He said. “I love you. Why would I give you a worthless gift?” And I knew it was true. And a peace flooded my heart. Then I saw my lecturers writing the report,  and my Savior was there, everything in His hands. And I realized that He cares so much. Every detail of my life. He is there. He is always here for me/you/us to go running into His arms.

Oh how He loves us, how He loves us

Everything is in His hands. I know there’s nothing to fear.
Thank You Jesus.

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